No one likes to talk about the possibility of canceling or postponing a wedding, but the fact is, sometimes that’s just what happens. Besides a change of heart, a wedding may be canceled due to venues closing, natural disasters, illness, bereavement, or a global pandemic. Likewise, the couple could decide to forego the formalities of a wedding. If you and your partner are facing a situation where your wedding will likely be canceled or postponed, you’ll discover there are several important steps you must take to go about it graciously. But don’t worry- the wedding professionals at Rose Hill Weddings have put together this list to help you know where to start, how to handle each situation graciously, and who to turn to for help.
Will You Cancel or Postpone?
This is the first major decision you’ll make once you see the need to change gears. If you still want to gather friends and loved ones together, but the timing simply isn’t working for you, postponement is the way to go. You’ll still have some work to do to rearrange your plans with your vendors and guests, but many vendors may be willing to work with you to reschedule, especially if the change is due to circumstances out of your control. Many couples are choosing, in the face of a global pandemic, to still have a very small ceremony with just two witnesses, then postpone the gathering of friends and relatives for a later date.
However, if you’ve decided to fully cancel the wedding altogether, you’ll want to notify everyone quickly and efficiently. You’re more likely to lose deposits and will need to return gifts, so be sure this is the path you want to take before making this decision.
Notifying Vendors
- Check your policies. As your first order of business, make sure you know what is covered and what isn’t for your particular situation. If you have wedding insurance, start there. Then move on to each vendor’s contract. Learn about their policies in the event of cancellation or postponement before calling.
- Be honest. Once you know your vendor’s policies, give them a call. Be upfront and honest with them about your situation, but be ready to lose your deposit or even incur a fee for changes. Depending on the reason for your changes, however, your vendor may be understanding and willing to work with you.
- Timing matters. The sooner you can let your vendors know that you need to cancel or postpone your event, the better. Consider the situation from their business’ standpoint. They may have already ordered materials or ingredients, turned down other business and blocked out time for your event. While many have an “Act of God” clause in their contracts, most do not accommodate a change of heart.
- Be flexible. If you’re just postponing to a new date, certain things still may need to change. Different flowers will be in season in the fall rather than the spring. Your bridesmaids’ dresses might need to be a different color. Talk to your vendors about how to change your plans to fit the new season within your budget and be ready to think outside the box a little. What develops might just pleasantly surprise you!
Notifying Guests
- Start with the travelers. Guests planning to fly, rent vehicles or needing hotel accommodations should be among the first you contact, as they’ll have major changes to make as well. On that note, talk to the hotel about canceling or rescheduling the block of rooms you reserved. This may save your guests one more step in their job of canceling plans. Some airlines offer credit toward future travel instead of canceling entirely.
- Make a wise etiquette decision. While formal etiquette would dictate mailing formal statements, similar to wedding invitations, to notify guests that the wedding will not occur or will occur at a later date, this process could be costly and timely. If time is of the essence, a personalized text or email will suffice and guests will appreciate your haste in helping them rearrange their plans.
- Know when to return gifts. If you’ve chosen to cancel the wedding entirely, it’s appropriate to return gifts, even the personalized ones, along with a thank-you card. If a would-be guest insists that you keep the gift, simply accept kindly and thank them.
- Be clear and be brief. Your statement that the wedding will be postponed or canceled does not need to be involved, nor does it require explanation. There will be time to explain your reasons to loved ones, friends, and family members. For now, a simple statement like, “The parents of _ announce that the wedding of their daughter to _ will not take place.”
One final note of advice: enlist help in getting through this transition. No doubt, whatever the reason for you to cancel or postpone your wedding, you’re going through a slew of emotions right now. Ask for help from a trusted bridesmaid, sibling, or friend. Get your list of vendors and guests together, go over it with this one individual, and let them have the reigns. They’ll contact you if they need to. In the meantime, take a few deep breaths, give yourself permission to feel all of it so you can heal and regroup.
Another Option: Don’t Wait…Go Virtual!
Canceling the “Big Event” doesn’t mean it still can’t happen…..though perhaps on a smaller scale. With virtual streaming platforms such as Zoom or Facebook Live, you can still have a wedding and have your guests share in the experience of it, too. Just have a dedicated computer or phone-person to stream the event. Whether it’s in a courthouse or your backyard, get everybody in attendance to dress their part, decorate with gorgeous flowers and table settings, grab your beautiful bouquet, and walk down a makeshift aisle of rose petals. Make sure the ceremony is recorded as well for you to keep and treasure, and when everybody can finally get together, then you can celebrate your nuptials with a big bash.
For help in creating the picture-perfect virtual wedding with stunning, fresh flowers (a must at all ceremonies!), contact Rose Hill Flowers to help you make the day you get married super special.